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Post by Mary H on Mar 10, 2016 12:21:09 GMT -5
I'm drowning... I feel like I'm getting ready to break... He's so very awful to me.. So self centered... He treats me like dirt... I want to end this right now & put all of his things on the porch... I can't do this anymore
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Post by Adrienne on Mar 10, 2016 14:10:33 GMT -5
Mary :-( My heart breaks for your hurt!!! I don't really know what to tell you because I know how much it hurts. My husband tells me he's fine with sleeping around and doesn't think affairs are wrong, and my gut instinct is to drop everything and run!!! So I know how it feels to want to just BAIL.
But is that God's plan for us and for our marriages?? Or does He tell us to take up our cross, to turn the other cheek, to forgive seventy times seven?
I'm sorry if this seems insensitive at all... I just know how awful it is to be in that drowning, desperate moment where you can't see any reason to stay. I want to urge you to stop looking at your husband, and look back to God. That's what this is all about,,, following God's will, pursuing Christ.
I can't give you tangible advice beyond that. But I can and will pray for you my friend.
Dear God, today I was reading about how to approach you in Psalm 95. Your word tells us to come to you with joyous willing hearts, with songs of praise and thanksgiving. But sometimes my Lord it is so hard to do that when all we can feel is this devastating hurt. Our hearts are broken Lord because our spouses have gone far from you and are no longer walking in your ways. We are feeling so sad and hurt God because we crave their love, yet their hurts have turned to the world instead of to their covenant partners. God we want to worship you gladly because we know that you are worthy of praise always, we honor you in our knowledge of your greatness and grace. But it is so hard to lift our hearts to you Lord when they are so heavy with despair. We beg you to please help us Lord, help all of us who are hurting and aching. I ask you for all my fellow standers, for all your servants across this wide world who are struggling in their marriages, and I ask you in particular for Mary, for Wendy, for TK, for Sharon, for these dear sisters who I know are hurting so badly right now. Please comfort them in your Spirit Lord, strengthen them and give them rest in you. Remind them of your eternal and unconditional love, and whisper the truth into their heart that you have good plans for them and for their marriages. I plead to you Lord on your behalf, that they may feel your loving embrace today Lord wherever they are. That they may be able to lift their heads again and put this burden back at the foot of the cross where it belongs. All this I ask in Jesus' name and in love for my sisters and respect for your will. Amen.
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Post by Sharon on Mar 10, 2016 20:09:05 GMT -5
Proverbs 15:1 a gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.
It is so easy to want to respond to disrespect and anger with a harsh word. Don't fall into that trap again Mary! God called us to be light. It is so hard to be loving when your husband is being so mean, but sometimes I control myself by thinking of Chris as a child throwing a tantrum. When I can imagine him as this little kid trying every tactic to get his way, it's easier to be patient with him. Tony is hurting and of course it's going to effect you. You're his other half and what he does to hurt himself he also does to you. We have to try to be loving even when it hurts because we remember these are Gods fallen children and they need to be shown love.
And I am not saying you have to keep taking it by the way. If you are frustrated and want him out, tell him to leave. If he refuses then become strangers in the house. Being forceful and kicking him out with aggression won't mean anything to him except that "you really haven't changed" but being quiet and loving while telling him something he doesn't want to hear - you see why I compare it to talking to a child.
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