So many distant group members

I still come here often to read what is being posted, but other than liking someone's response or an occasional short encouragement, I haven't been active. I feel at a cross roads right now. I saw David a couple of times in April, and we were friendly and comfortable with each other, and even intimate. Then he returned to his new home that he shares with her, and 'pooff' just like that he's gone again. I know it will happen in God's timing, but I'm having a hard time continuing to pray focused prayers for him anymore. I've been basically single now for 4 years (actually divorced 14 months now) but it was three years before that he disappeared from our lives. I still pray for him each day, and pray that God moves on the plan He has for her life as well, but I can't remember the last time I cried for David. I'm not even sure what I want anymore. I feel very restless. I really want to just run away from everything and just drive around the US pulling my home (5th wheel) behind me. 2 of my 3 kids see him, though they still won't meet the OW. He comes to see them at their homes. The one who still lives at home, he doesn't see her as much. I can only assume it's because I'm here. I do not want any kind of relationship with any other person - I want to be clear on that. But I'm not sure I see myself having a relationship with David anymore either. I just don't know anymore. Please continue to pray for me - for God to give me clear direction. Thank you all. I remember you all often in my prayers. ~Pat