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Post by Sharon on Dec 2, 2016 21:40:52 GMT -5
I'm feeling down and depressed. This whole thing has been an enemy attack. Naomi and I are still in the hospital and getting so anxious to be done. It doesn't help that Chris has not been by in 3 days to see us. He's working. He has homework. He's too tired and it's snowing. He has a million reasons and it's all fine. And I am being loving and kind and gracious, but yeah it hurts. It hurts because I would be here every free moment I had if it was him in here with Naomi. I would be visiting our son at grandma and grandpas. But he isn't going. He isn't coming. He's just going home and having his own free time. He has no empathy. It feels like no love. I know in my brain that God is enough and I don't have to rely on Chris. But dang man. The moments your husband should really be there for your kids and you. It's disappointing and I don't want to be burdened by this. I really want to put this onto Gods shoulders and remember who my real husband is. Chris will never be perfect but God is.
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Post by Adrienne on Dec 2, 2016 22:31:48 GMT -5
I'm with you, Sharon. I too am feeling sad and discouraged, and have been reminded by those feelings that I have to turn my eyes back to God.
I'm praying for you, sister, for forgiveness, peace, and renewed focus on God's love and purpose for your life.
Some verses that came to mind:
- "See to it that no one fails to obtain the grace of God; that no “root of bitterness” springs up and causes trouble, and by it many become defiled" (Hebrews 12:15) ---- I always have to come back to this one time and time again, it seems.
- "Then Peter came up and said to him, 'Lord, how often will my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? As many as seven times?' Jesus said to him, 'I do not say to you seven times, but seventy-seven times.'" (Matthew 18:21-22)
- "I have set the Lord always before me; because he is at my right hand, I shall not be shaken." (Psalm 16:8)
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Post by Sharon on Dec 3, 2016 0:16:52 GMT -5
Thank you Adrienne. I really needed to hear this today. Yeah I have these expectations and Chris is never going to be good enough. Never. Even when He does follow after God. Because God is the only thing that satisfies. Yes, I feel like I am being sinned against, because I was hoping he would care and it seems like he doesn't, but the choice to be bitter or forgive is mine. I can't let sin creep in....ugh! Please pray for us, cause like I said in my mind I am there, but my heart is aching.
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Post by Mary H on Dec 3, 2016 17:06:54 GMT -5
Praying
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Post by william on Dec 4, 2016 12:39:00 GMT -5
I'm praying for y'all, don't let the enemy get you down sister, keep pressing into God.
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Post by Sharon on Dec 4, 2016 22:29:23 GMT -5
I have been feeling lately like Chris really could be happy with anyone and I just happen to be the person he married and he's typically around, but any person would be good enough. He doesn't need me. I know this is the enemy, but I still believe it a little and I need God to help me. I know God made me for Chris. I know there are things he needs to do in his life and places he needs to go with God that wouldn't happen without me praying and being his support. But I still feel like he would be happy and good enough without me. I just need to get out of this...
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Post by tkk2 on Dec 4, 2016 23:46:52 GMT -5
Sharon, you're exactly right. The enemy is attacking. I know exactly what you're saying because I felt that way about Dana before as well. They are lies from the enemy don't forget that. You're fighting a spiritual battle, so prepare. I can't imagine having a sick child and the holidays.....I'm praying for you. Prayer is the most important thing you can do for your situation right now.
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Post by Mary H on Dec 5, 2016 10:45:47 GMT -5
Praying for you Sharon keep the Lord your God, your Maker, your husband first
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Post by Sharon on Dec 5, 2016 11:20:29 GMT -5
Sharon: "I just want someone to care about me" Chris: "Naomi will be fine"
Ugh...husband fail today. Thanks for all the prayers guys. Trip and then hospital, I'm really far behind on everything I need to do and I have follow up appointments for Naomi today, so I won't have time for what I need to do today either. Just feeling tired. Pls keep praying. I know it's just a season, a small trial, and in the grand scheme it won't matter. God is good and He is with me through this.
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