Post by Mary H on Oct 28, 2016 22:09:44 GMT -5
I just had a revelation
I've thought this whole time that this stand was for tony to see unconditional love .. to see how much God loves him through how I display Christs love to him so he can be saved .. & of course for the salvation of all who sees Gods glory in our testimony, for our children's salvation, & for some refinement for me to become more like my savior.
But for some reason tonight as Im opening my heart up to Him like I haven't in a while, He showed me in my heart how much I hurt Him ..
how just like our spouses are distant, cold, hurtful, selfish, & absent- we too are often very much the same way toward our Creator .. the Holy One who died for us ..
I ignore Him, give Him the silent treatment due to selfish laziness, I prioritize everything else before him just as our spouses do ..
Just as our spouses reject being intimate with us, I've been doing that to Him by not spending time in His presence .. just as our spouses are uninvolved with our kids, I too don't go out into the world seeking to bring people to Christ like we're called to..
how can I treat the only one who has ever really loved me just like my husband is treating me .. I've hurt so much because of the pain tony has inflicted on me through all this & much more is the pain of our Heavenly Father who is pure blameless and just ..
I am no better than tony ..
I treat my Love this way & because of my shame & pride I am so hesitant to approach Him or accept His grace, just like our spouses are with us..
I make excuses why I can't find time for him just to make myself feel justified.
I HATE that I get to this place of treating the Lord this way ..
I waver in the depths of me with my faith & trust just as our spouses have told us they don't think they love us anymore ..
o Lord, help me. Help us all to have a broken heart for what breaks Your heart. Help us to focus on your wants instead of our own. Help us to stay commited to You in every way no matter what!
To keep our "vowes" to You regardless of if we feel like it or not. Your so worthy Lord. This life is not about marriage restoration, but about MY soul being restored to Yours daily & You working through me to reach thoes around me with out my effort ..
Thank you Lord for our relationship that I take for granted.
Thank you for being MY stander & never letting me go ..
Your so faithful even when I'm not & Your love & grace bring me to life
in Jesus name
Amen
I've thought this whole time that this stand was for tony to see unconditional love .. to see how much God loves him through how I display Christs love to him so he can be saved .. & of course for the salvation of all who sees Gods glory in our testimony, for our children's salvation, & for some refinement for me to become more like my savior.
But for some reason tonight as Im opening my heart up to Him like I haven't in a while, He showed me in my heart how much I hurt Him ..
how just like our spouses are distant, cold, hurtful, selfish, & absent- we too are often very much the same way toward our Creator .. the Holy One who died for us ..
I ignore Him, give Him the silent treatment due to selfish laziness, I prioritize everything else before him just as our spouses do ..
Just as our spouses reject being intimate with us, I've been doing that to Him by not spending time in His presence .. just as our spouses are uninvolved with our kids, I too don't go out into the world seeking to bring people to Christ like we're called to..
how can I treat the only one who has ever really loved me just like my husband is treating me .. I've hurt so much because of the pain tony has inflicted on me through all this & much more is the pain of our Heavenly Father who is pure blameless and just ..
I am no better than tony ..
I treat my Love this way & because of my shame & pride I am so hesitant to approach Him or accept His grace, just like our spouses are with us..
I make excuses why I can't find time for him just to make myself feel justified.
I HATE that I get to this place of treating the Lord this way ..
I waver in the depths of me with my faith & trust just as our spouses have told us they don't think they love us anymore ..
o Lord, help me. Help us all to have a broken heart for what breaks Your heart. Help us to focus on your wants instead of our own. Help us to stay commited to You in every way no matter what!
To keep our "vowes" to You regardless of if we feel like it or not. Your so worthy Lord. This life is not about marriage restoration, but about MY soul being restored to Yours daily & You working through me to reach thoes around me with out my effort ..
Thank you Lord for our relationship that I take for granted.
Thank you for being MY stander & never letting me go ..
Your so faithful even when I'm not & Your love & grace bring me to life
in Jesus name
Amen
