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Post by tkk2 on May 2, 2016 17:59:58 GMT -5
My day started with with an overwhelming sadness. Still reeling from encounter yesterday with husband. When he left he made some comment that he is reading his bible....just the way he said it...like in my face ...that he's found some scripture that justifies his actions and ultimately divorce. Not sure i can explain it. My first thought was that he his twisting God's word.
I told a girlfriend today that he filed. I explained my call to stand....but she was happy that I'll look back on this in 2 years and and have a "good riddance" attitude. She is not a Christian. Still, it hurt. So, i canceled my last to clients and went home.
Since we separated I have purposely kept my family out of the mix. I'm a peacemaker so I didn't want any resentful feelings if Dana does come back. We are a strong Christian group. Over the weekend i told my family that Dana filed. Talked to my parents Friday night. Their response was so loving and godly, especially for Dana. Then talked to my youngest sister and brother-in-law Saturday night...similar beautiful response. A couple of hours ago my middle sister came over and i told her....figuring if i didn't do it today, she would find out tonight because my brother-in-law and Dad work together. She started by telling me my husband is foolish. She was bashing him. And i took extreme offense to that. She thinks I'm wrong to stand even after divorce is final. I mentioned some scripture and she threw it back at me (that I'm free since he was unfaithful) I finally said i will remain obedient to God, regardless. I understand that she feels left out of my life since we separated 18 months ago, but she was borderline mean. I encouraged her to say something positive....she didn't... and i asked her to leave. I just cant surround myself with any more negativity today.
I've been in my car at the park for 2 hours since, crying. Feeling defeated. Second guessing my stand. I need some encouragement. I feel very alone, except for you all. Nobody else gets it, what we are doing and why. It's all about LOVE.
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Post by leandro on May 2, 2016 19:20:51 GMT -5
Tk don't give up, you have to stay away from people that do not give you advise based on God's word, I had to stay away from my closest friends and family because they kept telling me to move on, and even if I had to stay by myself God has always been by my side. He never gives up on us, somehow He manages to always show me that he's there through a song or through reading something. We are always here if you need to talk I know how that feels staying in your car for hours not knowing what to do. Tk I declare the peace of God in your life don't give up.
“do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”
Philippians 4:6-7 ESV
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annie
Junior Member
Posts: 57 
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Post by annie on May 2, 2016 19:54:00 GMT -5
I wish I could physically be there and just sit with you on days like this. I too have spent many hours in my vehicle- crying- staring into space. Just really not knowing what I was going to do next. It makes me cry to even type this because I know this pain so well. It stinks. I wish I had a great reply. I search for answers myself. Eyes on Jesus. That has been my go to response to myself anytime negative or bad thoughts overtake me. I still have bad moments but EYES On JESUS!! HE has this taken care of for us. We do not have to fear. Pray for the Lord to reveal himself to you-- HE WILL. He's made himself known to me in such a big way. I am praying for you right now.
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Post by Eric W. on May 2, 2016 19:56:58 GMT -5
TK, the only thing I can tell you is follow where God is leading you, even if you feel like you have to walk the journey alone, because no matter what God will be there with you! I don't know why we as Christians in general don't understand the stand we have been called to. It's pretty straight forward, and not at all difficult. Maybe it's society, or just the world we live in today. The throw away, replaceable rather than fixable world we live in.
We understand sister, I think we all have those we have to choose not to discuss what is going on because of how the discussion turns.
This week is the National Day of Prayer, May 5th. I think we should take this week and expand our efforts of praying for each other. Let's make the effort to pray specifically by name for each other. At the end of all our church services, the pastor has us move toward the center of the sanctuary and take the hand of the person on each side of us, row by row and ask their names if we don't know them. So, that is our prayer partner for the week. Let's use this example and pray diligent, specific prayers for each other!
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erika
Junior Member
Posts: 81
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Post by erika on May 2, 2016 21:52:13 GMT -5
TK, I understand what you're going thru, some of my family members didn't understand my stand as well and it hurt, but don't worry trust in God, his plans are perfect. God brought all of us together for a reason, and I'm very happy He did. I'm going to pray for you and your husband. God restored my marriage and I'm sure He will do it for you too.
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Post by Mary H on May 3, 2016 8:56:31 GMT -5
I'm so sorry
I will pray
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Post by Adrienne on May 3, 2016 10:14:51 GMT -5
TK, and all my other hurting friends, I am praying for all of you. I know this hurts so much. I know people just don't understand - and don't really want to understand! But the One who matters most is 100% on our side and that's what we have to remember each day...
I feel like I have no comfort sufficient to offer but I'm praying for you today TK and asking for God to give you peace and a joy that can only be found through Him.
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Post by william on May 3, 2016 12:10:57 GMT -5
TK,
I feel & understand your pain, I too have had several nights where all I can do is cry. After thinking and praying for you I would like to share this with you.
Hope is defined as "a feeling of expectation and desire for a certain thing to happen." We as believers know that our Father in heaven is the only true and genuine giver or source that our hope can come from. He knows us more intimately, passionately & unconditionally than any human in this world could ever know. He has the ability, the power, & desire to give & to be that hope in order to fulfill His purpose for His greater glory. It is so easy for us to get down when situations in front of us are not what we would like them to be, but that is when our Father is preparing us for his promises & blessings to come. We In these times have to keep our hope in Him-our Father in heaven because hope placed in any other people, outcomes or anything else for that matter, are based & built upon sand which is ever changing as the waves of life crash against it.
You, i, and all of us have expectations for the/our future...and that is natural. Jesus Christ promised us a "living hope" of an imperishable inheritance of heaven and fulfilled that promise with His blood for those who choose to believe, have faith and follow His path.
Sister,
I know...we know, the pain your feeling is real...it is very real we all feel it with you. When we're feeling that pain heaven and God can and does seem so far away & that there is no relief in sight. What we can only do during these times is rely on "hope" in our Father because the difficulties He is allowing us to go thru are refining us, perfecting, and strengthening us for his greater glory to be revealed. Know that you are loved...loved by God the Father the creator of the universe, the One who knew & loved you the moment you were conceived, and we love you.
I'm praying for you sister, stay strong.
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Post by Sharon on May 4, 2016 0:42:44 GMT -5
Were all with you sister. The bible talks about how faith looks foolish to the world. Your sister is being defensive - my parents get this way. They have a hard time understanding the "become one" concept of marriage, because they haven't gone through something like this before. But God doesn't give this specific trial to everyone. He gives it to those of us that He knows will be faithful with it. So yes, let them look at us like we are foolish. We all are behind you and your stand sister. You are one with your husband. When he hurts, you hurt. Even when he hurts himself, your desire is for your husband. Your stand is for his sake, because you know God has a purpose for Dana and for you. He called you to stand Timi Kay and he has a plan for your marriage but even more for your future that is beautiful.
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Post by pstokes522 on May 4, 2016 22:08:17 GMT -5
TK - I also have had friends and family members that I have told if they could not support my stand for my marriage, that I would not discuss my life with them, & they shouldn't inquire. It's a hard thing to do; I have a cousin who I've been very close to my whole life, because we are so close in age, and I have no contact with her anymore because she did the same thing to her husband that my husband did to me. She was having marital problems so she found someone else, divorced her husband of 30+ years and moved to another city with her 'new man.' I was already standing for my marriage and she didn't get it at all. I tried to talk to her about what she was doing was wrong, but she wouldn't listen. She said she had spent many nights praying about it, and was at peace that God was ok with her new life. I disagreed and pointed scripture out to her, & said the Holy Spirit would never lead us somewhere that goes against the word of God, but she was having none of it. She is just as blind & deceived as David and all the other prodigals. It's sad, because she & I used to always be there for each other, and at a time when I really need her, she's not here. That is one reason I'm so grateful for this forum. We are all in the same boat on the stormy sea, and we're here to love and support each other. I think we're all spread out across the country, but we can all come together in this vast online world. I'm praying for each of you. I know God has great things in store for all of us!
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