annie
Junior Member
Posts: 57 
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Post by annie on Apr 16, 2016 15:49:56 GMT -5
I wish I could come here with good news, but I am just so broken and it seems like I just keep getting tore further down. I told you all I found out OW had been staying with Lucas. He was here yesterday to pick up the kids and actually stayed longer than necessary- playing ball in the yard and even picked up supper and came back and we ate. All the while I could hear the phone ding, ding, ding. It was the OW- she had texted multiple times before he replied. That happened several times. I felt okay when he left, but then he sent me this text- Gn love u don't be giving my lovins away--- completely destroyed me. It was not meant for me- but for HER. He hasn't told me he loved in a long time.  ? I couldn't even respond to him. Just ignored it. I don't understand how he can jump right back with her and claim to love her and just ignore me and our family. It was a knife to my heart. It still is. I feel betrayed - and y'all I know this is terrible- but I feel let down by God- why is this being revealed to me? Why did I get that hurtful message? I want him to say I love you to me so bad. I'm so weak. I want to scream. I feel like I don't even know which way is up anymore. |
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erika
Junior Member
Posts: 81
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Post by erika on Apr 16, 2016 18:01:07 GMT -5
Annie, I feel for you but don't worry just trust God !!! He will show you his glory. I know it's difficult to do it when you're going thru a difficult time but remember God is an expert at bringing good out of bad. "At present you may be temporarily harassed by all kinds of trials. This is no accident. It happens to prove your faith which is infinitely more valuable than gold." 1 Peter 1:6-7. I'm gonna pray for you and your husband.
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Post by tkk2 on Apr 16, 2016 19:10:45 GMT -5
Annie...your storm is great...there is no denying that. But the good news is....god is greater. His purpose for revealing that to you today, may be to simply show you how much Satan is screwing with your husband. ...and causing doubt and confusion for you. Stay strong....eyes on god girl! He's got this.
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Post by william on Apr 16, 2016 20:50:46 GMT -5
Sister,
I know that hurts and hurts really bad. I know what it is like to want to hear your spouse say "I love you", as my wife doesn't not express or say any actions / words related to affection, I can feel the tension & disdain radiating from her when I do get the chance to be around her & it crushes me each and every time. She is still hardened from all that I have done, and either doesn't want to see me for what/who I am today because it's easier for her to hold onto the pain I had caused.
While it is very hard, I choose to be full of humility, kindness and love towards her because God shows me that each and everyday. She does not wear her wedding ring any more, divorce papers have been filed by her, she has told me not to text her except re: our kids, when we are around each other she chooses not to speak much at all to me & stays on phone a lot. With all of that, I know that thru my prayers, fasting and reading his words what God has commanded me to do, & as I have told her I will not disobey God again. I have complete faith in God, even with the hurts, let-downs, and tears- I rest assured because it is in those times that my faith & trust in him grow.
So please sister, stay strong in faith, steadfast in prayer and remember that every emotion you feel, the heartbreak, betrayal, pain, depression, and loneliness God himself felt that tenfold when Jesus was on the cross. I will be praying for you & your husband, know that you are loved by God and us brothers and sisters in Jesus Christ.
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Post by Sharon on Apr 17, 2016 14:42:20 GMT -5
Annie, it is so easy to look at God with anger and distaste and ask him Why? Why would you give me this burden? Or if you didn't give it to me, why would you allow it? I am sure Job was tempted many times to think that way when he was battling his storm - losing his entire family, all of his wealth and land, and all of his friends. He went from being a righteous, God following, wealthy, happy, family man to a mourning bum in sack cloth weeping to the Lord. But in all of his storm, he never denied God. He said to God that he didn't know why he was going through this trial, but he trusts God. God knows why he is going through it and God has his greatest interest in mind and so he didn't lose his faith. Let me remind you that this text you got is NOT from God. It's from the enemy. He is trying everything he can to drive a wedge between you and the only one who can fully comfort you and heal your marriage. Do not let the enemy win! That text was intended to break you down. Don't let it break you down! Let it push you closer to God, so that he can be your comfort and strengthen you. The Lord will never leave you. He will never forsake you. He has never been the one hurting you. It has always been the enemy, whispering in Lucas's ear and trying to tear you down and discourage you. Please don't let him play with you like that! Don't give him what he wants! Fight against him, by pressing so hard into God that the things of this world disappear from sight and all you can see is your great comforter. He loves you Annie. He created you and He knows you better then you know yourself. He knows what you can and can't handle and He's allowing you to go through the fire, so that he can shape you into who He needs you to be, and even though it's painful, He knows you can handle it and it will make you so much stronger! I think Eric was the one who talked about being a lump of metal that has to go through the fire to be refined and reshaped into a tool that the Lord can use. The flame is hot and painful. It isn't a comfortable place to be. The hammer striking us is painful. But in the end, God will create a tool that he can use and we don't know what he is making us into. A sword or a shield or a helmet. He's creating something beautiful out of our pain and misery. We have to trust him. Remember the Bible calls us to consider our pain as pure joy, because it creates perseverance. You have to go through the trial to become something amazing and without the trials, you would never become what the Lord needs you to be, so know that when you are in the middle of the trial, that is God giving you an opportunity to learn and become what he needs you to be.
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Post by marissaa91 on Apr 17, 2016 17:02:19 GMT -5
I'll be praying for you Annie. Sharon is right, it's ok to ask God why but you have to allow Him to answer you in His own timing and and a low Him to work in His own timing. And sometimes God wants us to put him first before He changes anything. He must always remain our focus, always be enough for us even if everything is taken away, always be our God. He loves you and feels your pain Annie. God will bring good out of this storm somehow, he always does.
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Post by Adrienne on Apr 17, 2016 21:26:37 GMT -5
Annie, I am praying for you and I"m really sorry to hear about this fresh wave of hurt. I don't have any wise advice... the only thing I can say is that often we don't understand why things happen, but God is in control and He does have good plans for us, even if we can't see them. Often, the path to the good is wrought with pain. "valley of death," right? But He is always with us. Also, I have said it many times in this group and will continue saying it... Eyes on God. That means they can't be on our spouses. Nothing good comes when we focus too much on them... but there are always blessings and renewed strength when we focus on GOD.
I'll stay in prayer for you and your babies, and for Lucas and this OW (who is also totally lost) also.
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? I couldn't even respond to him. Just ignored it. I don't understand how he can jump right back with her and claim to love her and just ignore me and our family. It was a knife to my heart. It still is. I feel betrayed - and y'all I know this is terrible- but I feel let down by God- why is this being revealed to me? Why did I get that hurtful message? I want him to say I love you to me so bad. I'm so weak. I want to scream. I feel like I don't even know which way is up anymore. 
