He ruins the Devils schemes

Yesterday was a crazy day. Chris is going to Florida for a short "deployment"/training exercise. I thought it wasn't on my mind and he left yesterday morning and I prayed for him and kissed him bye. He called a few hours later to say they're delayed a day and he is coming home. When he got home, he asked if I wanted to go see Risen with him and I said yes, so we left the kids with my parents. We had lunch before the movie and Chris was talking there. He made a joke like "can't wait to get out there and show those women what it's all about" and gave this sideways smile. He and I used to make stupid jokes like this a long time ago, because I was convinced at that time there could never be merit to it, but now I believe we called down curses by announcing Chris's weakness to the devil. I got angry and I told him that is not funny. Not even a little bit, and he got taken aback. He said he was just joking and I snapped "yeah well it would be funny if it just stayed as a joke!" And all of a sudden the conviction came on. I get so angry when he goes on deployments. I believe he can't be loyal and I don't want to give him the opportunity to prove himself. I am just angry and bitter. I apologized immediately and he was stung by my comments, so he didn't accept right away, but after about 20 minutes or so, I told him I truly was very sorry for acting that way and can he understand I'm a flawed human being too and I am remorseful for how I behaved. I think that made a difference to him, to be able to look at me the way God looks at me. I'm not perfect. I never will be. And I need forgiveness and grace just as much as he does. We had a great afternoon after that - the movie was awesome and I made us dinner and even packed him a lunch for his flight so God was able to use my weakness to show Chris we're all sinners and fall short - not just him.